Monday 26 March 2007

The perennial problem.

Everyone over the age of 21 complains about. Or so it seems. I was an early starter, I started complaining about it at the age of 17. Time. It just goes too gosh darned fast!

This time last year, as I prepared myself for the horrific fate of being apart from my darling partner for a whole year, I thought that SURELY 2006 would be the slowest year of my life. Well, no, actually it wasn't. Not only that but it wasn't a horrific fate being separated from my partner for a year. In fact it was very manageable. Not enjoyable, but definitely manageable.

Anyway, I find myself here, yet again agog at "how fast time has gone by" and spouting such awful cliches as "where has the year gone to already". But it's true! I hate to be unoriginal in my observations but time honestly gets faster as you progress in years. Already, at 24 years old, it seems fast.

So this is our perennial problem. Everyone complains about it, it doesn't get any better as you get older and there really is nothing you can do about the passing of time. It's going to keep going whether or not you like it. But maybe there is something we can do to assuage this feeling of being robbed of our precious time. Maybe, instead of constantly being head down, butt up, busy busy busy, we can allocate time to myself to just sit for a while every so often.

I personally think that this is really important, especially for my mental health. I have always needed space to myself, but more and more, as demands on my time increase, it has become absolutely necessary for my survival. I need a decent period of time every so often to faff about, stare into space or just do nothing of real consequence. I need to escape the constant "should" mantra that keeps chanting on in my head. You know the one: "You should exercise more, you should be studying, you should finish that email to Bob..." But never does it say "You should relax". That's something you need to fight for and claim for yourself.

Luckily, I have a wonderful man who (even from a distance) keeps reminding me to take on less and sit back and relax more often. I'm pretty sure that without him I would be a gibbering wreck in some corner, rocking back and forth wild-eyed, repeating over and over "I should... I should..."

The "shoulds" of this world can drown you. But it's only if you let them.

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