Sunday, 1 April 2007

Hanging on to a moment...

It's my 6th day of my third and final tour of Adelaide, visiting my beloved other half. In four days he graduates from FTA (Flight Training Adelaide) as a certified pilot, with all sorts of licenses and ratings that I am barely qualified to write about! I'm immensely proud, as any good girlfriend should be, and a little overwhelmed that he has achieved so much in so little time. Not that I for a moment thought that he couldn't but I have just realised (having read his reports and paperwork) HOW much he has learnt. None of which I understand at all!

So here I am, with the person I adore most in the whole world, wondering how on earth I savour every last minute available to me with him. You see, I have no idea when I will see him again. It could be June, it could be September. And September is an awfully long way away. Despite time going really fast.

It feels like I can't tell him enough, can't let him understand fully enough how much I absolutely adore him. I can't let him know how emotionally desolate I would be without him. He means so much to me that I can't explain it. Which annoys me as usually I am quite good at expressing things!!

I feel like I'm scrabbling in the dirt trying to hang on to every last moment, desperate to try and hold on to time. But it keeps getting away from me and I don't know what to do about it. How many times can you say I love you? How many times are enough? When does it start getting old? Are those three words enough? I'll agree with Snow Patrol on this one that they sure aren't. Not for me, not in this situation, not to explain how I truly feel.

I guess the heart will never be able to fully articulate itself with words.

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